Such a simple thing as self-love can transform your whole life! But if it is so simple, why it is so difficult to love ourselves? And doesn’t it sound a bit selfish?
Self-love is not just about pampering yourself. Although it might be a nice addition and a sign that you care about yourself, without real self-love it would be meaningless and might leave you feeling guilty and empty inside… at least without a particular reason.
Do you have feelings towards other people? What kind of feelings do you have towards people who are important to you? Do you care for them? Do you do your best to support them?
Now think for a while what kind of feelings you have for yourself? Do you care about yourself? Do you support yourself with warm, compassionate words? Do you give yourself the space to hear and fulfil your deepest needs? Do you think you are important person in your life? Do you believe you are a “good enough” person?
That is what a real self-love means to me. Being compassionate, understanding and forgiving towards yourself. Taking care of your deepest needs and respecting them. Appreciating yourself and being able to say NO, wherever you feel that something is against you. Standing up for your own values and beliefs.
If you still think that it is selfish… consider how would you call a person who puts everyone else first, wants to help everyone and give advice, neglecting their own needs and problems. A person who never says NO to anything despite their own beliefs. A person who doesn’t follow their true life values and doesn’t appreciate their efforts in any part of their life. Is this person in a good position to help and support others? Will it be genuine and effective?
I feel compassion towards this person… because loving yourself is key to the love and respect of other people!